Things I wish they told you when getting a massage!

Massages are great!  Especially the places that give you a comfy robe and let you soak your feet in a room with dim lighting and soft music playing.  I have had my fair share of massages over the years at a lot of different places.  I haven't quite found a place that has the whole package yet though.  The Village Spa has the greatest atmosphere but Serenity has the best actual massage.  At Serenity they don't pay lip service to the hour long massage, they don't count the time it takes you to take your clothes off.  Once they start massaging you, you get a full hour of massage (even if your massage therapist has a coughing fit in the middle and has to excuse herself, yes this happened to me).

Now that I think of it, I should totally write reviews on massage places and post them for people looking for the right place.  I have tried at least 10 places in the Cincinnati area and could give some good advice on what is good and bad about each place.  But, I digress, this blog post is about another related subject. 

You would think after my numerous experiences that I would know what to do, how to act and just relax.  Unfortunately, I don't.  There are a number of things I wish they would tell you upon arrival.  Add it to the paperwork, expectations and instructions.  I always feel awkward when I walk in because the person at the front desk just assumes you know what you are doing.  Um...yea, I don't.  Every place is different; every place has different rules.  So, here it is.  What I wish they would tell you when getting a massage...

• Are you allowed to talk?
• How much interaction should there be? (Do I say, "Oh yea, that feels good" or is silence golden?)
• How do we make it the least awkward experience?
• Eyes open or closed?
• If something hurts or you don't like it how do you signal them to let them know?
• Can I request you to continue in a certain area or does this throw off the whole session?
• How long can I lay on the table after the massage is done?  You say, "take your time" but how long is that really?
• Hair up or down?

Overall, I just think there should be some actual talking about expectations before everything gets started.  The front desk should tell you exactly what to do and what is going to happen, even if you have been there before.  Because let's face it, even people who have been there aren't going to fess up to not really knowing what to do.

There should be a plan before any clothes comes off.  Again, I am a bit of a control freak so I know not everyone feels this way but having a game plan helps me relax so I'm not inside my head the whole time I'm getting rubbed down. 

I mean it is already kind of awkward having a total stranger touch your bare body parts!  Help a girl out!